special occasions
New job – Off you fuck!
New job – Off you fuck!
New job – Off you fuck!
It's always traumatic saying farewell to a treasured colleague.
It's even worse when you are jealous as fuck, and seething inside with resentment that they chuffed off before you got round to it.
Fear not, you are probably not alone, and as you watch them poddle off – all fake-sad into the sunset with their Asda 'WHOOPS!' flowers (stickers carefully removed obviously – you have a carefully cultivated image as a Waitrose person to preserve after all) you can probably sense the wet silvery chill of barely concealed hostility wafting after them like a passive-aggressive Patronus escorting them off the premises.
"Good luck! We're going to miss you!"
"Hope you like your new colleagues!"
"Hope they all have uncontrollable flatulence and steal your milk".
Twat.
Happy Hallo-weenie!
New job – Off you fuck!
New job – Off you fuck!
Mummy! Let's do a Cat!! A Halloween 'Pump-Kitty'!
Great idea, Sweetheart! I mean, how hard can that be?!?
Quite hard apparently.
Nothing says 'Happy Halloween' like a crudely carved knob.